…And church became a routine

That was quite a long break I took from blogging. It had to be done. I had too much on my plate and I just decided to put everything aside and focus on two of the projects I was working on. I’m sorry blogging had to take a back seat in the last three weeks. I had stretched myself out too thin but now I’m back! I must say I have really missed writing on my blog. I looked at the stats a few minutes ago and you guys kept reading even though I had no new material on the blog. Thank you! I don’t take it for granted. Like I said I am back and I have loads to share.

At the beginning of September (I think it was way before then actually) I began to feel a numbness in my spirit. One of the disadvantages of combining your passion with ministry and your job is that at some point, church begins to feel like “work”. I reached that point a few weeks ago. I was going to church not because I was eager to receive a word from God but because I knew I had to be there to work. It wasn’t a great feeling.

I longed from a break from my routine. I hate routines. I hate monotonous work. In the last 2-3 months, that is what I have done. I tried to find ways to spice up my work in ministry thinking it would help. It didn’t. So week in week out I forcefully dragged myself to church and the office just because I had to. I found a way to take the break I so desired as our annual convention was approaching. As God would have it, the week before the convention was scheduled to start, we had the two day sallah public holiday. I used that opportunity to travel to Ibadan. It was mainly to get ready for the convention but I also needed the time out.

For the first time in like seven months, I went to church as a regular person! I sat with the congregation and listened to the word. Nothing was expected of me. I paid attention to the word and I was fully engaged in the worship session. It was truly refreshing. The pastor preached on the topic, “What are you looking for” and it was so apt. In my work in ministry, I had lost the God element in it as I fell into the every day routine. It got so bad that it began to affect my personal spiritual life. I began to pray for God to put me back on track; to bring back that excitement that I had early on in the year.

I remember the night after the first session of the convention, I stayed up to talk to God. I told Him I didn’t have any long list of requests regarding what I wanted to take out of the convention. All I wanted was for the numbness to leave me and to have a fresh encounter of Him. God answered my prayers last Friday. I had an encounter I had never experienced before. I felt the move of God. I felt His power over me. I felt the numbness leave my heart. I didn’t want to leave the venue that night because I loved the experience. God gave me more than what I asked for. I received impartation from several mighty men of God. Honestly, that day was a turning point in my life.

If you’re in ministry, it’s important to separate what you do from your relationship with God. It’s difficult but it has to be done. Sometimes it’s difficult to see your pastor beyond being your boss. I always chose to see my pastor as my boss which means I deprived myself of access to the pastoral leadership that would have been of help to me. One of my big sisters told me that I just have to find the balance; know when to talk to my pastor as my pastor and know when to talk to him as my boss. The other thing is being able to maintain the excitement of going to the house of God. As a church worker, the things that don’t distract the normal church member will distract you; chairs not arranged properly, something not working as it should, posting updates of the service on social media…the list is endless. In all of this, you must not lose God. You must not become numb. Church should always be a new experience and not one of those things that you do.

I am learning how to maintain that balance. Ministry is something I am passionate about but it must not come in the way of my personal relationship with God. I am learning to put God right in front of everything that I do. I’m grateful for the refreshing of my spirit and I’m ready to fly!

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