Good morning! I thought I’d write an early morning post before my busy day starts. There was something that came to my mind yesterday and it is about how we are defined. When people ask “Who are you?” What do you say? Do you describe yourself with reference to your occupation or your marital status or you define yourself by the strengths you possess?
I remember when I was much younger and my dad was the MD of one the leading finance companies at the time. Every time I went out, I was always described as ‘Mr Jaiyesimi’s daughter’. I couldn’t understand why they wouldn’t just say “This is Doyin Jaiyesimi”, leaving the person to figure out that I was Mr Jaiyesimi’s daughter. I felt that being his daughter should come after being ‘Doyin Jaiyesimi’. Sadly, for my entire teenage period, I had to endure being called ‘Mr Jaiyesimi’s daughter’. It bothered me to the point that I told myself that when I grow up, people will know me for me and use me as a reference point for my parents.
It’s been many years now and the definition of me has changed. I should say it has evolved. I have moved from being person A’s girlfriend to being the girl with straight A’s. I have evolved from being ‘Incredible Hulk” (my nickname during the time of my life when I was such an angry teenager) to being a lady who could care less.
So who am I right now?
I am Adedoyin Jaiyesimi. I made a conscious effort last year to begin to rebrand myself. I wanted to be known as Adedoyin Jaiyesimi and not Doyin Jaiyesimi. Adedoyin Jaiyesimi is the mature version of Doyin Jaiyesimi. She is a woman who loves God with everything she has. She is resourceful. She is a problem solver. She’s smart, knowledgeable and informed. She stands out from the crowd. She has poise and she is not afraid to speak her mind. I have made a conscious effort to ensure that this is how I am perceived by people.
You need to set your own definitions of yourself. Don’t let people define you. Some weeks ago, my supervisor in the ministry said, “Don’t call her Doyin. She loves to be referred to as Adedoyin.” I smiled when he made that statement. I’ve never told anyone to call me Adedoyin but more and more people are doing just that. It proved one thing to me; people will define you by how you define yourself.
Reject any negative definition that anybody wants to give you. If you are struggling with your self esteem, open your Bible and see what the word of God says about you. It says you are wonderfully and fearfully made. It says you are royalty; a ‘royal priesthood’ to be exact. It also says that you are the light of the world. You are more than a conqueror. You are a winner. Take charge of the definition of you. The best definition of yourself is being God’s precious child. Embrace that definition. Own it. Live it.